The Best Week of November

Insert: Guns n' Roses [by Paradise Lunch, Baccano OP]


There's several things I wanted to touch in this month...waitno. This week LAWL!
It's just too amusing, and AMAZING for me. =3


Simply one of the best experience <3


Now, let me start...

= = =

:: Human Communication Presentation ::


I had HC Presentation this Thursday (24/11), so the whole week, including the weeks before that, I've been soooooooooo busy regarding the presentation AND the paperworks. But to be honest, I'm NOT worried at all.


Why?


1. I have the BEST TEAM of my whole life.


I'm not even KIDDING when I mentioned "Best Team". Team 5 compromise of me, Soon Ying Xi, Claudia Hwa, Ziyad, and Alvin. I'm very proud to say that I'm PROUD of every members in this group. They truly gave out all they had for the presentation. Though when we're preparing the paperwork and the slides, there's things going on here and there, but then at the end, everyone just BAM and it's just...perfect. <3


And the outcome...


2. I have NEVER had such a great Presentation in my WHOLE life.


I talked, like river flowing... I'm not thinking, I'm not stopping either! It just came, and there it happened! And the best part was, the slides were PERFECTLY prepared, and everyone were speechless by our presentation (yes, I DARE to say that! =D)


I have never been in such excitement for such a long time...


3. Even AFTER the presentation!


Yes. I am dedicated to write a blog-post for this memorable day, with my teammates. Helpful teammates... Seriously, it's been a long time--- no. I had NEVER had such great teammates before in my LIFE! I love all of them...maybe not the dudes. Since one smokes and another one didn't do much for the paperwork. Still... I respect for what they had done.


I'm just gonna give a shout-out to those honorable people here:

"THANK YOU YOU PEOPLE! YOU MADE MY LIFE WHOLE AGAIN! 8D"

4. Yeap. It was AWESHUM. <3

= = =

::  Contemporary Festival ::


Ohgod. The 2-days consecutive music-orgasm day... nonono. Not JUST my ears, but my body and soul are FILLED with musics! And I came to respect a lot of people because of their performances... =3 If I must name one, it would be Rebecca, the drummer. Though I don't really like the way she hits it (compare to other drummers with... weird antics, I must say LAWL!), I definitely respect the skills she had and the improvisations/ideas she had in mind =3


That aside...


1. I learned DAMN lot from the workshops.


I don't know why there's so few people around the corner but... I dare to say that the ticket fees definitely WORTH IT. From all of these workshops, I realized that, though most of them said almost the same things... one needs to LEARN how to do so, is pretty hard and requires a lot of stuffs within one self.


Let's say... Learning how to "Listen to the others" and "Respect their spaces".


Don't get it? Lemme tell you.


Listen to the others - refers to listening to what the others are playing. The dynamics, the flow, how many bars, the harmony, etc. Now while listening closely, you can based on them, and do your thing. Especially when one's soloing, you NEED to know when they're playing on some special things that you can help to add in - especially for the rhythm sections, those cues are important.


Respect their spaces - You do your thing, but you DON'T overcross the line/boundary in the harmony. What does that means? It means that... (especially while one's soloing), you do NOT play louder than the other instruments, and you must know what you can do to compliment and help in building up, not to force or being the leader or the one that wants to outshine instead. That occurred quite often in bands, where each of them wanted to show their skills and whatsoevernot. But then, they forgot about this, and they tend to blast their techniques all over the places...which I don't approve, and I don't get the music flow thanks to that. :/ and it's a quite famous Western band that did it, which I am deeply DISAPPOINT.


I wrote SO MUCH and learned SO MUCH from these workshops. I wrote a total of... 4 pages FULL of shtuffs from listening to them. Normal class couldn't even make me write them down. But these workshops are just...aweshum.


Though, note to self - never listen to the others on WHICH workshop you should go. Because I kind of disappointed when I went to the Ensemble Workshop and I SO wanted to go for the Bass Workshop, which I can ask more questions... DAMN! >A< If there's another Bass-related workshop, I'M GOING DDDDDDD<


2. Gonzalo Rubalcaba is my Inspiration.


Ohhhhhhyesbabeh. I dare to say this. There's NEVER a single musician is able to inspire me, but his workshop, definitely could. (Speaking of this, I SHOULD go and listen to Kajiura Yuki's songs and all those Final Fantasy songs and... mmmhmmm, let's just make them inspire me more from musics themselves ;3)


He thought me a lot of shtuffs, though some I already knew subconsciously but still, they're good shtuffs. I wrote 3 pages for HIS words, and he inspired me in how my new song SHOULD be =3 (which I was pretty confuzzled and headache of that piece @w@)


I note down A LOT of words that he spoke. Like...


"If you think of the things you wanted, you will find times for them. But if you don't think of them, you won't even do it."
>>> I thought a lot regarding this... it's so true. When you think of the things you wanted to do, you will naturally fix a time for it. But if you don't think of them at all, you forget about them, and you won't even do it.


"Need to spend time at least 5 - 10 minutes together in a family."
>>> Morale support is important, and it's important to let your family to know what you're doing and stuffs. Though I personally don't do this pretty much (because... haha. <w<) but I DO agree with this statement. (Just that, I didn't do it. OTL|||)


"Little simple things give you a bright moment and give you energy/support to continue."
>>> A simple nod, a simple hug, an acknowledgement... They're not much, but they drive you further indeed. =3


"Listen to people around you."
>>> Listen to people's thoughts - each and everyone had different conclusion in their mind regarding one situation. That includes the things that you did, and produced. It's important to listen to people's comments about the things you've done - whether if they're acceptable in the community, or they're not. Of course, it's not about "follow what people wanted", it's just to listen, and to improve. If you don't listen, you cannot improve. (But of course, listen wasn't just using your ears - read those comments includes in this as well. XD)


"Love is what fix everything."
>>> It's true. When you have love, you know how to accept things. You open your heart out and listen to them, listen to yourself. And if there's love, there will be no war, no hate... yeah, you got it ;3


"Let the music to surprise you, surprise yourself of what you can do."
>>> Follow the flow of the music, and let yourself to follow the music as you play and improvise... let them lead your play, and surprise your own self =3


"Tell a story in a more unique way. Forget what you have done before, try new things."
>>> Everyone tells the same story, but how to make it more interesting and more unique? This phrase is pretty important <3


"Respect the space of each one, and cooperate/learn how to pay together. Acceptance is important."
>>> You can only respect someone when you start to accept them? Hmmm... Though I agree both of them are VERY important in playing as a group, since you need to respect their playing, and accept their playing, in order to function as a team.


"We need to listen to each other. [Cut] We rehearse without these (amplifiers)."
>>> Remember: Amplifiers are only to project and amplify the sounds of the instruments. Still, they don't control your original-volume as you play. And to play as a group so to harmonize the whole band, is to listen to each of them. Without amplifiers, you learn to listen using their own original volume. As you proceed, you're able to control your own dynamics/volumes to match the other one. This is a way to improve your band-playing as well. (VERY IMPORTANT! >D)


Yyyyeap. All of his words... definitely worth the original price of RM50--- no. I don't even THINK that should be the extent of it. It worth even MORE than that! If you want me to pay RM100, I would SO go for it =3


After all those workshops...


3. MY FIRST TIME OUTDOOR CONCERT!!!


I have NEVER been into an outdoor concert before... And it was just amazing! Seeing the crowds having fun... wow. The first day, I memang HOT LIKE MAD! That wasn't the extent of the outdoor concert...


4. My first-time experience of LASER-ART!!!


It was simply AWESHUM! I dare to say that I'm so touch by its beauty that I nearly cried for the first time seeing it <3


That was the first day, though...


5. Second day: MAH FIRST TIME UNDER THE RAIN CONCERT!


Ohyeahbabeh. SYOK BETUL! And it was really amusing that even though it's raining, people still gather around and have fun with the musics! 8D Damn proud of this concert itself wei! <3


6. I dare to say, this is my First-ever BEST CONCERT!


Ohyes. The players in this festival are all top-notch people. ESPECIALLY OUR OWN UCSI BAND. It was simply AMUAZING. I must emphasize again: AMUAAAAAAZINGGGGGG. And Frances is definitely AWESHUM! Through this concert, I once again held utmost respects to everyone playing up the stage there. And especially Mr. Juan Pablo. I simply adore his compositions! Though I dislike the fact that the teachers said that "Pop musics are JUNK musics", but I must understand that compare to those Latin musics, Pop musics are really NOTHING.


Still, I wanted to compose AWESHUM Pop Musics. >D


And seeing how Ms. Lee conducted in the stage makes me wanna to that too LAWL! XDDD


7. And I dare to say: Asians play BETTER than anyone else!


Yes, Westerners may sound better in vocals but... Instrument and band wise, I don't know why, I'm deeply moved by the Asians' bands. (Especially our school's band, once again 8D Though they compromise of different members for each songs but still, best of the best!)


But then hor, that vocalist in Asian Beats hor... Sorry lah, but I REALLY want to hor, beat the crap out of your and let the saxophone/trumpet to take your place lah. D< YOU SHUCKS. Let Frances sing your place! LET HER DO HER JOB! -shot-


I was wondering why Asians play better... was it because I'm bias? But I really don't get the feel when the westerner's band's playing it :/ Not only me, Kou felt the same as well. And also the others... hmmm. I wonder why. Was it because Asian players listen to more genres of musics? Hmmmmmmmmm. -thinks-


8. Still... IT'S AN AWESHUMSAUCE WEEKEND!!! 8DDDDDDDDDD


Though, I must note to self: When it's a Contemporary Music Fest, it's best to bring your LOVER instead of your best friend, because those romantic songs sounds just soooooooo awkward at that time, and especially when you and your best friend are FOREVER-ALONE-ING. =3=;;;

= = =

Phew... After those things for the week, I'm... sick. XD
Must be because of the rain and the things I ate <w<
I should get some more rest... .w.


WHAI YOU BLEED RIGHT NOW?! WHAAAAAI ;A;


I TOMORROW EXAM WHAI YOU BLEED RIGHT NOW?! TAT


I just hope that my Drum Exam will be smoothly conducted ;3; -prays to the god-

Of Families and Hatred

Insert: 黑吃黑 (by A-Mei)


Normally, I won't do this. But today, I think of keeping a journal of how on earth I'm raged by my family... just to note myself NEVER do that to them anymore.


省下力气。


11.11.11


You, call me, to take care of my nephew YOUR golden grandchild, today.
But you, did not, tell me, when and all those details.


Fiiiiiiine.


I go to my bro's house right after school time - to do my job as I promised you that day.
And, should I say "luckily" I called you and tell you that I'm there already.


Oh, how foolish I am.


You're frustrated over the other end of the phone, and tell me that they're still gonna come over to our house to eat dinner. Uhuh. Why did I not think of that?


Clearly because you didn't tell me WHEN on earth the parents of the child is going off.
And you're saying as if you're not going to be there for the whole damn night.
And now you're questioning “你怎样做东西的哦？”


Fiiiiiiine.


My fault, then.
My fault.


I shall either NEVER help you in taking care of that foolish grandchild that's been paaaampered by his other grandparents anymore, or I shall do it my own way, or I shall be kindly ask for all those details from you.


And then you will be saying this:


"This is common sense! Why you need to ask? I thought you already know!"






"Thought". Truly, the best word in the WORLD.






Oh well, it's okay.
I can always say "Oh sorry I'm very busy I cannot take care of those miiiinial stuffs."
I can always say THAT.


And don't be angry or be sad that time.


= = =


Sometimes, it's not what I become, it's how you raise me made me becoming who I am.
And through those ages under your... cage,


I came to hate you people.


I have stated this in my old blog, and I'm continuing in my new blog.
Because that's how you treat me, and I'm keeping this salt to my wound in the future.
To remind myself never repeat any foolish mistakes that I would make upon you people's...

"Ideology".

Money Managing?

Insert: Uso [ED in Fullmetal Alchemist, by SID] / JAP [by Abingdon Boy's School]


I have pretty much problems with people's money management, like, seriously.
I know life is short, you need to live fully to it, blah blah blah.
But seriously, money saving is IMPORTANT duud! D<


I can't believe there's really some that doesn't save up, AT ALL.


You get like, RM120 per week, yet you have nothing left?
I know inflations and shtuffs are becoming worse in Malaysia but still, you can at least save like, whut, RM10?
The veeeeery least la, come on! D8


Don't think that's RM10 ish small, okay?


= = = = = =


So this is normally how I manage my money.


Let's say, I get RM300 per month.


I would firstly, keep 10% of them up - in this case, RM30.
Then carefully, plan my plans for everyday.
Let's say one meal ish like RM5 for minimal, edible, food.
There's like, 30 days per month, so it'll be like, RM150 goes to food.
(Of course, if you're not eating through your own money every day, you can cut the amount.)
Transport fees, since I'm driving, I would prepare like RM50 for that.
So I still have like, RM70 left.


Now I still have RM70 left. I did other kinds of expenses with this amount. Let's say...


Buy Text books?
Buy Wen Ju (?)?
Buy better foods for myself?
Buy fashion shtuffs?
Buy/Repair new/broken shtuffs?
Throw them into my savings?


Yeap. And mostly, since you don't need to buy text books for like, EVERY SINGLE MONTH, and I'm pretty sure some don't even buy them at all, I skip the first one. The second one wasn't really needed since I had my notebook now, so I'mma skipping for the second one. Third one, maaaaybe. But it's not like I everyday eat luxurious foods so... skipping for the third one. I'm not a shopping person, so yeah. Skip the forth one. Fifth one? Unless you're so unfortunate you broke things often, you can skip that too. Therefore, the sixth one is mostly my choice.


Through this kind of management, I can like, have AT LEAST RM30 as saving (per month), and if I'm lucky enough, I get extra RM70 or RM 100 (from the food) for savings.


= = = = = =


So how would I manage my saving, if I do have? Let's say, I had like RM1000 right now (okay, I know that's impossible, but if you keep that method above for at least one year, I'm sure you can do that if you're still a student, have jobful parents, don't need to pay for rentals by your own, and you definitely don't need to give your money back at your parents), I do this kind of planning:


Take RM500 out, planning as below:


50% - medical expenses/saman/accidents
50% - personal survival emergencies (just in case if things happened with your current money in hand and you have the lack of usage in money)

Another RM500:

Do whatever you want with it LAWLZ.


= = = = = =


Now, there's this type of people that I HATE the MOST.


Once they get the money...


60% - all living expenses (they deemed) / MAKAN SYOKSYOKSYOKSYOKSYOK
20% - buy whatever things they wanted / SHOPPING TAIMU!
20% - help "unfortunate friends" / BELANJA KAOKAOKAO
=== 100% Sekajigus Goodbye. :/


TBH, this kind of people will end up borrow money from the others, because they will find out that they have no money anymore since they're spending it WRONG. And usually, they will THOUGHT they still have a lot of just spend them all in whatever they wanted... then when they realized that they did not have enough money, they will borrow from the others.


Worse case happened when you have a credit card, because you will be using your FUTURE money to pay your PRESENT expenses.


So actually, it's like this instead of the above:


80% - Makan / Shopping (either or, you decide)
30% - Shopping / Makan
30% - Belanja
= 140% OVERLOADED EXPENSES D8


So where the other 40% come from? BORROW LAH! DDD|
And if they're used to this kind of money-spending cycle, they will slowly become like this:


50% - paying back the debts
50% - Life / Shopping
30% - Shopping / Life
20% - Belanja/KEEP MY FACE MAN!
= 150% STILL OVERLOADED D00D! DDD8


But it's hard to change, seriously. :\


And most people don't notice that they started from the veeeery first I said, and slowly, transformed into the above.


Bankrupt is not included in this example, because that's an unfortunate accident. D8


PS:
I REALLY discourage people to borrow money from the others.
And don't EVER borrow your own money to the others - for they will not pay you back. Srs.


= = = = = =


And most of this type of people will say these...quoted from REAL speeches. :\


"I BO LUI LIAO! (I no money already!)"
>>> My ass. You got A LOT, just with bad management :\


"HAIYA! Next time I pay you back lor!"
>>> Next time next time, as you drag, 2 years later also never pay back yet lah!
>>> Normally this kind of people are used to use this quote at A LOT of their friends who trusted him or her, and gets the money, but rarely pays back. Even if they did, they will still have a huge amount of debts.


"EI, come, I belanja you! Har? No money? NEVERMIND LA! We FWEN ma!"
>>> ...if you no money, PLEEEEEASE, don't belanja. Learn to KEEP YOUR GOLD, not KEEP YOUR FACE! It's better to lose your face than lose your gold, which you will lose even more faces in the end!


Either that, or something similar.
I'm SERIOUS. D<


= = = = = =


Not done yet... might add some BAD examples later, and some good examples if I found one @w@

Juuuuuuust feel like doing something... stupid.

Insert: Egao no Hana [Negima Kazuki x Sayo character song]


And so, I was just........flipping through my diary (because I need to write some certain MPC in some certain forum >w>) and... I spotted some certain shtuffs in my diary, that I juuuuuuuust feel like EG-ing about it. XD

= = =

我不知道要怎么说才好。。。
>>>But you're already talking.
我并不讨厌你，但是我并没有那种所谓“大好き”の感情。
>>>Daisuki janai, ai no kanjou desu.
可能使我本身不了解这种感觉，我不知道这种滋味
>>>Touzen da, you no love anyone before :\


我还是没办法明白，
>>> Of course you don't understand.
你到底能有多了解我，
>>> You're no mind-reader :\
能有多接受我，
>>> I can comprehend a lot...well, in the past.
能有多理解我，
>>> Maybe not thaaaat much, since you're a Scorpio anyway. -shrugs-
明白到你能说喜欢我？
>>> Do I need reasons to love you? :/


当然，我并不排斥。。。。。。
>>> Orlynao.
如果你认识到真正的我，
>>> Which one was it? The current one, or the past one?
你能确定你不会后悔吗？
>>> I never regretted in anything, just to tell you this :/
你还会想待在我身边吗？
>>> The past one - definitely |3
我不肯定。。。
>>> Yeah, you don't. You can't predict the future.
我能相信你不会背叛我吗？
>>> Betray? Naaaaaah.
如果你真的能接受这样冷血的我，
>>> I...once thought I could, but it's you who pushed me away so... Okay, I'm dumb. =w=;;;
我不介意你待在我身边。
>>> Orlynao. :/


不过，我并不会是属于任何人的，
>>> No one belongs to no one. They had a life and freedom, y'know? |D
请你明白这一点。
>>> Look the above.
我不可能成为别人的东西。
>>> Look the above.
如果到时你要离开我亦无法阻止你。
>>> I don't know izzit me leaving you, or you're pushing me away. :\


除了光以外你还跟谁说过这件事？
>>> Ippai no hito da! The whole blog knows! 8DDDD -shot- (Okay, maybe not thaaat obvious)
我不希望别人知道。。。。。。
>>> I know, I know.
就算在一起也不能光明正大，
>>> Duuuuuuh.
你能吗？
>>> If I can't, I won't be confessing to you, dumb dumb. :\


我给你时间，
>>> I don't need time D8 Well, now maybe, I need to compose more and stop procrastinating.
The decision is up to you.
>>> WAO. YOU HAZ ONE LINE OF ENGRISH. -applause-
どちもいい。。。。。。
>>> Ara, sou...
だって。。。
>>> Ara?
I don’t care……
>>> Ara, soooooooooou... :\ (If you really don't care, you wouldn't even reply me.)


ま。。。安心なさい、
>>> Nani ga anshin tte...?
まだ友達です。
>>> Tomodachi dake de wa hoshii ku nai yo =A= Motte nai naraba, kowasareta no hou ga motto itaku nai da yo~ |D


これは私の答え。
>>> Ahh hai- tte nagai D|
いいですか？

>>> Ii janai. Zettai ni II JANAI.

= = =

Okay, I'm so bad. BUT I HAD FUN!!! 8DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Feel free to kill me. |DDDDDD

If you are really reading, of course. NYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA~

KAKATTE KOI!!! >DDDDDDD

愛、過去と現実。

Insert: 解脱 / Sad Rain / Love Letter /你是愛我的 / 平常心 / Should I Love Him?


I might be writing this in two languages...
Just for the fun of it...


= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =


Out of boredom, or just a sudden impulse,
I decided to write about the so-called history of my lovely lives.
They're nothing for me to be proud about,
Neither they're something for me to reminisce.


Just that...


I just can't deny the feeling of my heart that dwells on the past.
And the inability to move on from it.
Though, I tried, and I ignored all sorts of feelings that I had.
But then, I just can't deny them, at all.


= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =


已经有。。。两年了吧？
算算一下，好像也是呢。
那两年的时间，仿佛过得太快了。
而那两个礼拜的时间，仿佛像永远般的，徘徊着。


我们，真正有在一起过吗？
我们，真正有说过分手吗？
你说，你和我分手了。
我说，我们根本什么都没有说过，做过。


根本什么都不是。


虽然，我们有过一次的约会？算是吧。。。
嗯。。。。。。又好像不是。
嗯，有抱过 （算是吧？），有牵过手，
然后，也有去过你的家还有。。。
咳，详细就不说了。
虽然，我们都没接过吻就真的是。。。*sigh*


人们都说，初恋时最难忘的，最甜蜜的，最有遗憾的。
我说，如果你还是那一个人，可能这是真的。
如果，我能够坚持，你能够接受，可能一切都会有改变。


啊，如果啊如果，如果这世界有如果，那人们也不会有遗憾了吧。


不过，如果不是因为你，我也不会有所成长吧。
可能，我还会在另一个人的面前，死命的展现出自己那什么都没有的“才华”吧。
可能，我还会拼死名的粘住某些人。
嘛，虽然它不算是一个坏事，不过，你是唯一一个让我大开眼界的人。
还好你是我的初恋吧，让我能够更有毅力的下定一些决心。


不想继续了，没有希望了，就把他们丢掉了吧。
把爱剪成碎片让它随风去。


但是，也是因为你的存在，让我害怕了恋爱。
害怕希望，害怕伤害，害怕追求，害怕结局。
要不是某人忽然地问我，我可能也不会再次跌入这一个坑。


那时的日子是很开心，不过，回想起来是超苦涩的。
而且，那一段我自认最白痴愚蠢的做法，我以后是绝对不会再做了。
还真的是要好好的感谢你呢。


还有，今年四月的事情，我是绝对不会忘记的。
你虽然没想到我会有这么白痴，也没想到我的心情是怎样的。
没关系。
我以后也不会再这么白痴的跟着人家团团转。
多谢你，我才能够对人狠心一点。
多谢你，我才能够分辨是非与重要性。

Thanks to you, I can finally ignore a lot of stuffs that doesn't deem to be important to me.
Friendship? Relationship? Oh please.
Those are really nothing compare to myself.
If someone wants to die - go on, have fun in the other world.
Without you, nothing will change in my life.
If I have no one else to talk to, I can always talk to myself.
Then rage, and die, like everyone else.
Yeah, that's what you taught me in that lesson.


And you certainly taught me well.

所以说，如果人们问我为何忽然会这么的冷淡，冷血，
特别是四月之后，
我只会说我累了，就这么简单。
但是我绝对不会对他们说是因为你，教了我这件事。

If people ever noticed how much I secluded myself from people. Heh.


I guess you ARE that much of impact towards me.


PS: Thanks you to, you gave me enough inspirations to write like, what, 6 songs? Though neither of them really are down in the papers yet... Heh.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =


Of course, thanks to you, I met someone else as well...


Should this be something I shall be happy about?


Heh. To be honest, I doubt it.


And the worse thing that happened was that I really threw myself in.


= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =


Dear... (I can't believe I can still call you this. -sigh and facepalms-)

你是，我可以说，我用了最多心思的一个人。
我从来，从来，都没有亲手画。。。漫画？ 给一个人。
更何况是用了很多个版本/纸张 Draft, Sketch, Second Version, Sketch, Paper cutting, etc.
画了之后还录制一首歌给你，让你在夜晚可以睡得更好一些。
过后，还特地到你家去，强（？）吻了你。*咳*
之后，还买了花和蛋糕，放在你家门前，按铃后，走人。
想象一下，我真的不相信我做了这些人们都觉得很荒唐的事情。
然后我还（因）为你录制了自认最好听得一手自创曲。


你竟然不相信那是为了你的。


Seriously, what the FOOK.


你有这么不相信我是真的真的爱着你的吗？！


Fine, whatever.


反正从你身上得到的回忆，也算还蛮不错的了。
对一个对我根本没感觉的人来说，算真得很好了。
有笑过，有哭过，有抱过，有吻过。
算了吧。


虽然你一直再说着关于 “他” 的事情。


Funfact: Kou, does this remind you of anything? -smirks-

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =


I finished with the past, now let's come back to the present.


There's a reason that I couldn't fall in love with the current princess...
Datte, ouman no hime-sama ni nachatta.
Annan no hito ga zettai atashi no mon janeen dakara saa~ ¯\(－ ▽ －)/¯
And those disappointments? Yeap, they're just too much.


Off you go~ （╯°∀°）╯︵(>.∀.)> 


Then the most recent one...
I just CAN'T fall in love with that one, at all~ t(=3=)t
Reason is simple: No feelings from the other side, and I can't do anything about it.
So yeah.


Off me go. ┬──┬ ︵(>.Д.)>  


= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =


虽然埋怨（？）是蛮多的，不过，我真的没有后悔过。


虽然我是很希望回忆可以快点散去。*siiiigh...*

I Hate You.

Insert: Hate [by NIGHTMARE]


NOTE: They're not in orders on whom I hate, and they can be just anyone. If you think you're in my list, feel free to feel that way. I don't care.



I hate you. For letting me down.
I hate you. For the lack of logic and common sense.
I hate you. For not letting me to love you.
I hate you. For who you are.
I hate you. For being someone I'm not.
I hate you. Fo' Dos Stupid Unneeded Caps W/ Shortcuts Like Dis.
I hate you. For creating the stupid fashion that's not fashion at all.
I hate you. For giving me everything but not those important stuffs.
I hate you. For being a bad teacher.
I hate you. For being a bad friend.
I hate you. For you who sucks.
I hate you. For the lack of love for me.
I hate you. For raising me wrongly.
I hate you. For owing me money.
I hate you. For owing me your life.
I hate you. For I need to drive for you everyday.
I hate you. For disappointing me.
I hate you. For being someone that's not yourself anymore.
I hate you. For not being straightforward.
I hate you. For concealing yourself behind that mask.
I hate you. For being such a bitch.
I hate you. For the lack of plans.
I hate you. For the lack of timing.
I hate you. For not being punctual.
I hate you. For not following my rules.
I hate you. For smoking.
I hate you. For drunk and drive.
I hate you. For being an attention-whore.
I hate you. For sharing out stuffs even yourself is disgusted by it.
I hate you. For having such confidence even though you sucked.
I hate you. For being over-confidence though you sucked A LOT.
I hate you. For losing.
I hate you. For being not in this country.
I hate you. For you who's unreacheable.
I hate you. For not taking care of your own body.
I hate you. For being poor and still rather help the others than yourself.
I hate you. For no able to take good care of your own welfare.
I hate you. For creating MMORPG.
I hate you. For dragging into the world that I disliked.
I hate you. For creating something such disgusting and no one likes it.
I hate you. For making me unable to sleep.
I hate you. For being short.
I hate you. For making me a female instead of a male.
I hate you. For making me unable to love who I wanted to.
I hate you. For not giving me any chances.
I hate you. For you who gives me hope then crush it to pieces afterwards.
I hate you. For lying to me.
I hate you. For tricking me.
I hate you. For all those sweet memories you gave me.
I hate you. For those memories turned bitter.
I hate you. For not knowing my dislike for coffee.
I hate you. For not saying anything at all.
I hate you. For being such an attention-whore--- wait. I mentioned this just now. Whatever.
I hate you. For the lack of innovations and creativity.
I hate you. For the lack of common sense--- wait. I think I repeated this as well. Hmm.
I hate you. For how can you not know a way for business.
I hate you. For the inability of understanding accounts.
I hate you. For the inability to teach AT ALL.
I hate you. For not making any safety precautions and procedures which hurts people.
I hate you. For causing accidents and hurting the others thanks to your lil' careless mistake.
I hate you. For abandoning your child.
I hate you. For hurting the child.
I hate you. For I can be a better date.
I hate you. For the inability to give happiness to a love.
I hate you. For being self-centered.
I hate you. For your egoism.
I hate you. For being EMO.
I hate you. For being emo but not and you're just a freaking ATTENTION WHORE.
I hate you. For being so friggin' fake.
I hate you. For the lack of common sense--- WHY THERE'S SO MANY LACK OF THIS?!
I hate you. For being stupid and foolish.
I hate you. For trolling to destroy.
I hate you. For letting me feel guilty.
I hate you. For making this country worse than it was.
I hate you. For trying to make each other racist.
I hate you. For being discrimination at people.
I hate you. For creating lousy music.
I hate you. For the inablity to teach me.
I hate you. For you who's myself.
I hate you. For being lazy.
I hate you. For the lack of inspiration.
I hate you. For losing what you originally have.
I hate you. For losing your voice.
I hate you. For losing your mind.
I hate you. For losing your heart.
I hate you. For wearing a mask.



I hate you. And the list goes on and on.


And I hate you. For the sake of hating you.

Misunderstood / Stirring...

NOTE: Direct copy from my FB status.
Insert: 如果或可是 / 真的真的很爱你 [NOTE: Different songs :/ One sang by me, one wasn't]


‎"...you said you didn't believe this song is meant for you. By saying this, you're denying my love for you. You really thought that I'm still in love with my first love - but seriously, who doesn't? You did the same. But if your denial towards my love is really the reason why you just won't accept me, then fine.

It's already been months, and I really don't quite care much about this already.

I've brought you on a date, I've sang songs for you, recorded songs for you, drew a mini-comic/leaflet as your birthday card, brought you a rose, gave you a cake, hugged you, kissed you.......

...and they're still not enough to prove my feelings for you?

I grinned at the thought of that, bitterly. Especially of all that I've done for you. Oh well, if that's how you really think, then I really have nothing to say, my dear.

And as someone's suggestion, I should have just forget about you.

And I shouldn't have typed my blog out.

Yet, I dislike misunderstanding.

So, I typed them out.

Just to let you know - if there's fate, once again - and to let myself know, how stupid I am fall into the wrong hands again and again..."

~ Arcym, Misunderstood




= = = = = = = = = =


Some Little Things That's Not Typed Out:


All those aside, I have never regretted in any of these.
Since they're the once that helped me learning something new.
And I'm pretty sure even though I really still am in love with you,
You will never come back to me.

Unless someone proved me wrong - but that's highly impossible.

And so, I shall continue living.
Living on those days that I have, or never, met you.
Yet, I will still be reminded of those things that the both of us shared.
Which... I'm pretty much was annoyed about.


The stirring in my heart, I just couldn't stand it...


-sigh-


Oh well... Time to go.

真的真的很爱你

Insert: 真的真的很爱你 (by yours truly: Me - Akira Rei / Arcym)


Wow, I can't believe this...
I love my new template 8D
But it's rather hard to fast-post it in the Blog itself anymore :/
But it's pweeeetty DDDDDD8


= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =


So... I've uploaded this song, like, finally.
And, like, erm...
I don't really plan to let that idiot to listen to this so...
Hmmm.


I'mma just posting it up.


Oh, disclaimers: Guitar not by me, repitching not by me.
I only provide my own voices ;3
Guitar is done by Melissa Sasa and Repitching ish done by Kou.
And I fall in rabu with mahsewf 8DDD -shot-


PS: This is NOT the full version of the whole songs, there's still more instruments to come in. This is just a BETA version. ;3


The Link For The Song: http://www.box.net/shared/ahe6c0mx0sq395njnick

= 真的真的很爱你 Lyrics =

Verse 1:

我好想念和你 S M S 的快乐

我好想念和你西哈打闹的快乐

多么的开心，多么的幸福

就这么简单就能得到满足

我好想念和你手牵手的日子

我好想念和你互相调戏的日子

那一片蛋糕，那一杯红茶

就这么奇妙的变成了佳肴

Pre-Chorus 1:

但，欢乐的时光就是那么快结束的

被我的理性，被我的双手

是我先放弃了爱你的资格

让这一小段奇迹般的幸福结束了

Chorus 1:

但是我真的真的很爱你

爱到我控制不了自己的感情

不想掉入这个没结果的陷阱

却又一次一次被你的温柔所拉近

就因为我真的真的很爱你

爱到我遍体鳞伤还继续下去

刻意的避开你我持续不下去

就这样慢慢的被你的温柔所侵蚀

Verse 2:

从哪天开始我们不zai通话

从哪天开始我已经把你给隔离

但我删除不了你，删除不了回忆

一遍又一遍重复读着我们的过去

从哪天起我不再等着你的消息

从哪天起我不再拿起手机 S M S 你

那时的快乐，那时的伤心

我很想把全部关于你的忘记

Pre-Chorus 2:

但，我每次都下不了手，股不起勇气

这一段幸福，这一段感情

哪怕只是一片浪漫的幻影

它在我脑海里深刻地留下了痕迹

Chorus: 2

就因为我真的真的很爱你

爱到我遍体鳞伤还继续下去

不想掉入这个没结果的陷阱

却一次又一次的被你的温柔所拉近

但是我真的真的很爱你

爱到我控制不了自己的感情

刻意的避开你我持续不下去

就这样慢慢的被你的温柔所侵蚀

Bridge:

泪不停的落下  我处于地狱中  生不如死

就像伤口上撒了一堆盐   心被打碎   身体被疼痛所麻醉

好痛苦

Chorus 3:

我真的真的真的很爱你

爱到连我自己都快要窒息

它就只是个奇迹般的幻影

却逼真得让我堕入下去不能够回去

就我真的真的真的很爱你

爱到我控制不了自己的感情

明明很清楚这是没结果的骗局

最后还是欺骗了自己

就因为我真的真的爱着你

所以我才必须离开你

So... yeah, that's all for this post. ;3

Hope you guys enjoyed this =3

Or not 8D

Don't hit me if you don't DDDDDD8

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

It's been, well, a while...

I still don't regret about my decision.

But whenever I see that name popping up in my notification,

I would immediately went onto that post, and delete everything of mine.

Just because I don't want to be reminded anymore.

I've deleted almost everything and as much as I could.

But this song...

I guess, let this song be the only reminder, then.

Since, well, this is also a beautiful song.

I must thank someone for giving me such inspiration to make such a good song.

But I don't want to be reminded of that someone any longer.

Perhaps I'm not over yet,

Or perhaps I am.

Maybe...

Hmm.

Either way, I wanted to move on...

So don't come into my life anymore, thank you.

I'm out. |3

= = = = = = = = = = =

:: EDIT ::

Ohhell you said this song wasn't meant for you?!

Fine. SUITS YOURSELF.

If you really don't believe it, then don't.

Though I really dislike misunderstandings.

Just to tell you right here right now:

I have loooong moved on from my... I couldn't call that an ex. Let's see...

That princess, yes, I should call that B that.

I have no longer bear any feelings for the current Princess, you see?

The only thing that remain in my mind regarding that B,

Is only, and ONLY, the past Ice Mountain.

I will never be in love with a bitchy princess.

That's how I came to -coughlovecough- you and get rid of that feeling.

You just won't believe it, huh?

Oh it's okay.

I've done WHATEVER I could.

And also to heed someone's advice, I really shouldn't bother but STILL:

Until you FREAKING call me, I shall NEVER find you back!

I. Hate. Misunderstanding.

If you have anything, talk! Speak that shiz out!

Keeping in your FREAKING HEART doesn't make anything much better!

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF---

See? This is WHY I freaking hate you people. ARGH.

I don't care about it anymore. -storms gracefully walks out-